Bye Bye Binky; Ten Tips to easily Wean the Pacifier

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If you are a parent you know the struggles of saying Bye Bye Binky! But follow these 10 tips to help eliminate the pacifier easily. Soon your little one will be free of the binky and all with the least resistance possible!

(This article originally published Jan 16, 2013. It’s been refreshed with updated content and relaunched for your convenience)

Bye Bye Binky; Ten Tips to easily Wean the Pacifier

Bye Bye Binky

It doesn’t matter what you call it; Binky, Pacifier, Soother; we all face the same problem. How does weaning pacifiers away from our children work when you want the least path of resistance? I was cursed and blessed at the same time that neither of my boys would use a pacifier.

Those first few months were a big adjustment and full of very little sleep. But my daughter is a completely different character. Once she took a Binky there was no looking back! She was the Binky Queen! And oh those nights of sleep were bliss!

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There was no taking the pacifier away from her. I thought, “oh I’ll just wait until she falls asleep, sneak in and take it out of her mouth. Then she can get used to not having it in her mouth all night long and wake up without it.”

Yeah, that didn’t work. The moment I took it out of her mouth, she immediately woke up and cried for her Binky. There was no consoling her. No distracting her. And no option of just letting her cry herself to sleep. It didn’t happen. She would cry for hours until I gave the Binky back. This is why I delayed saying “Bye Bye Binky!”

But when she reached 3 years old I knew I had to say bye bye binky with her. I should have weaned the pacifier long ago. The ideal age to wean your toddler from pacifiers is right around 12 months. But that isn’t always the best for each individual child.

With my daughter’s speech delays, I didn’t want the horrible battle I knew I would have. She wouldn’t understand when I tried explaining. So I put it off. But I decided we had reached a point that I just couldn’t put it off any longer. Bye, Bye Binky!

We were done! And guess what? It was a lot easier than I thought. But I know many people struggle to get their little one to give up the Binky, so we did our research and found some easy tips to help you and your child say “Bye Bye Binky”.

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1. Take away Binky sooner than later. Most babies usually only need their pacifier up until 12 months. After that, it is solely a comfort mechanism. More so than in earlier months. So if you are able to take away a Binky before they become too attached it is much easier. Plus they are not old enough yet to resist and protest and beg for the Binky again.

2. Limit Binky Time. This method has you limit the amount of time your child spends using the Binky. Usually, this means only allowing them a Binky at nap time and bedtime. Then once your child has adjusted to this new schedule; begin not having Binky allowed for nap time. Eventually, you will be left only with bedtime. Then simply stop cold turkey for bedtime.

3. Cold Turkey Binky removal. This may not work for some children but believe it or not; it was the easiest way we tried. It is also the way I’ve heard many parents praise as being the easiest!

I already had my daughter limited on the amount of time she could use a Binky. It’s always been a rule since she first accepted her Binky at 4 days old that she was only allowed to use a Binky at naptime, bedtime or when she was sick. That was it. So I couldn’t begin by limiting Binky time. It was already limited.

I also didn’t want to have to struggle with trying to get her to understand that she couldn’t have Binky anymore at nap time when she could have it at night time. It would be very confusing for her. So after New Year’s Eve, I hid all the Binkies. When it came bedtime and she asked for Binky; I simply said, “Binky is all gone.” she whimpered a little. Asked for Binky again. I reemphasized that “Binky was All Gone”. She gave her little pout, but eventually settled down and went to sleep. No crying, no tantrums, and no fussing all night long! It was amazing!

The next night she asked for Binky once. I reminded her that it was all gone. I got a little pout from her but she went to sleep without it. She never asked for it again.I was seriously expecting a much bigger struggle about saying Bye Bye Binky. But the cold turkey method was so easy! No going back and forth. It’s gone and she accepted it.

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The trick to this method is that your child needs to understand the term “all gone” or “bye bye”. Or be young enough that they can easily bounce back and not put up much of a resistance.

4. Make Binky taste bad. There are many things out there that one can use to apply to the Binky to make it taste bad. I have heard of some even using Tabasco sauce. Ouch! But the idea is that if it tastes bad, the child will no longer want it.

My mom tried this method with me and thumb sucking. Sadly it didn’t work for me. I was smart enough to just go wash it off my thumb. Again, my Poor Mom! She put up with a lot from me. Sorry, Mom!

But still…if your child is younger this very well could work.

5. Get Creative and involve the child. I’ve seen many different suggestions for helping your toddler say Bye Bye Binky. If they are older this works well. Some suggestions include

  • Have the child give their pacifier away to a new baby. Obviously, due to germs you probably wouldn’t actually give it to the new baby. But your child will think it has been given to someone else who can use it.
  • Trade it for a new toy.
  • Tie it to the end of a helium balloon and watch it fly away.
  • Involve your child in throwing them out into the trash. Then they know they are all gone.
  • Use the Binky Fairy. Just like a tooth fairy, only they collect old pacifiers instead of teeth.
  • Bury it with a seed. Then they will get to see the seed sprout and they think the pacifier turned into a plant. It’s just fun.

6. Alter the Binky. This is a method I would not recommend myself, but during research, it kept coming up as a successful method. Over and over again. So I thought I should include it and leave the decision to you.

The idea is that you alter the Binky to where it is unsatisfying to suck on. This varies from poking little holes in the top or to cut off little sections of the rubber part down to the nub.

Safety note: Cutting off the tip of the pacifier could be dangerous – small pieces could break off and become a choking hazard. One-piece pacifiers are less likely to have pieces break off. If you poke a hole in your child’s pacifier, be sure to supervise him when he’s using it and check it regularly for signs of wear.

7. Read books and find resources. If your child is older and comprehends more, you can share stories. This will help them prepare mentally for giving up the Binky. There are many children’s books aimed specifically at helping children give up the pacifier.

I typed in  Bye Bye Binky on Amazon and found a vast amount of resources! from Books to DVDs! Even a sweet ELMO Bye Bye Pacifier DVD and a cute Binky Fairy story.

8. Big Kid Day. This is a special day when you set the child down and reason with them. Explain to them that they are a big kid now. Tell them all the fun things that big kids get to do. And explain to them that big kids no longer use Binkies. Then take them out for a day full of big kid activities. Go out for ice cream. Get a cake. Play fun activities. If the child asks for the Binky, remind them that they are now a big kid.

9. Countdown to Big Kid day! To make tip #8 even more special create a countdown. Make a simple paper chain countdown. Each day for the week to 2 weeks before mention about Big Kids Day. Remind them what happens on Big Kid Day. Have them involved in the countdown. Get them excited for it. Then on the actual big kids’ day; they are excited and more willing to give up the Binky.

10. Bribery and reward! When all else fails, bribe them! This may seem funny, but you may be surprised how many toddlers might actually go for this!

Now while I didn’t have to bribe my daughter to give up her Binky; I did reward her. Explain to your child that if they can give up their pacifier for X amount of days that they will get a reward. Make it a good reward too. They are giving up something precious to them. For my daughter, we got her a new bedtime stuffed toy.

If you have a toddler who is attached, saying Bye Bye Binky can be hard for them. Some things to remember is to never make them feel bad or less because they still have a pacifier. Never use any negative tones at all. This will hinder any attempts.

Never say,

  • “why can’t you be like…”
  • “you need to stop being a baby…”
  • “only babies use Binkies, are you a baby?”
  • or anything of that nature.

Keep the entire event of removing the pacifier from the routine as positive and happy as possible. It will help the child feel more confident in themselves. And it will allow them to give up the pacifier a lot easier.

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Also remember, each child is different. What works for one, may not work for the next. Take each child as a case by case basis. Each child will be ready to say Bye Bye Binky at different stages.

And different professionals offer differing opinions as to when the best age to wean a pacifier is. Some say 12 months, others say 2 years. See what is best for your child. Remember these tips and soon you will be Binky free too!

What have you found to be helpful in saying Bye Bye to Binky?

 

 

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59 Comments

  1. These are great tips! I struggled with this with my older son but my younger never took to a passy. It’s hard to get them to give it up when they love it though!

  2. Thanks for the tips. My first two wouldn’t even accept the pacifier, but we try every time… hoping for a little soothing time. I just have a feeling this 3rd baby will throw a curve ball at me and go binky bonkers! Lol

  3. What a great post and it is so funny because with the new year, we also got rid of the binky… ha, ha, ha!!! thanks for the post

  4. So so glad I didn’t have this problem with Brody. He did great getting off the bottle and he didn’t even like his paci!!! Great topic though! I know lots of moms will want to read this.

  5. Thanks for the tips. I am going to bookmark this to come back in a few months. I just had my baby and he will need to be weaned off his paci in a few months!

  6. My twins both gave their pacifiers up at the same nap when they were 6 mos old. The baby never took them~ though I tried so hard to get her to because she had colic. So, I have never had to go through this.
    I do have to say, though, that I HATE, HATE, HATE seeing 2 and 3 year olds running around with them in their mouth all the time. I seriously try not to judge other moms but I always find myself passing a little judgment on that. I can’t help it. Yeah, you don’t want to listen to your kids cry so you’re giving in? It only gets worse as they get older…

  7. Ahhh….the binky. I love a baby with a binky!! We did the cold turkey thing with both of our kids and it worked fine. There were a few days that we really, really wanted to let them use the binky, but we all lived through it. Good luck when it’s your turn!

  8. TOTALLY bookmarking this. We are no where near ready to wean Zane of his binky but these are great tips. How did you come up with these awesome ideas?

    1. I’ve been taking notes for many many months from experienced parents, family members and of course lots and lots of google searches. lol. I’ve been researching this one for quite a while. lol

  9. My children never used a binky but my middle child is a thumb sucker. It’s been a struggle since you can’t just take away his thumb! LOL!

  10. I guess I was lucky none of my kids would take a binky, but I watched a lot of friends struggle taking it from their children. Great tips.

  11. Bub really only used his to chew on and it only lasted a few months! I do love these tips and will keep them handy for my great nephew!

  12. I feel lucky Leo was able to give up the Paci already. He never really seemed to take an interest in them. We were able to do the cold turkey method successfully with him.

    1. OH I hate the thumb sucking! I was a thumb sucker. I still remember it. I was SOOOO STUBBORN for my mother. And because of that memory I do everything I can to stop and prevent my kids from sucking their thumbs. I sort of pushed the paci to prevent the thumb sucking. Cause you can always take the pacifier away, you can’t take a thumb away. lol.

  13. My advice? I have never seen a grown man or woman with a pacifier. Let them have it if it is a security option. They will wean themselves, usually around preschool time. It works out just fine.

  14. Interesting tips here. None of my little ones took a binky so I will not have to deal with this fortunately. My 2 year old (almost 3) does suck her two fingers though. I am thinking back to my older children (okay, they are now 20 and 19) and the battle I had with their dad (now my ex). He took my oldest son’s pacifier away when he was really young and he switched to sucking his thumb, and he sucked it for years. His dad would not listen to me that it was too soon (he wasn’t even a year old). Our second son was a very big pacifier baby. With this son we waited til he was over a year old and slowly weaned it and them made it disappear. He never took to sucking his thumb. So i would definitely say don’t try too early.
    I also have to say, I don’t like that “alter the pacifier” tip at all. Sounds dangerous.

  15. Great tips!
    We had thought we weaned my son at 18months but when his baby sister was born and he saw hers, he was hooked again. We weaned my daughter cold turkey at 12 months and my son at 2.5 by having him take all this suckies to Toys R Us and buy whatever he wanted with them. He used them as cash. Worked AWSOME! Now my 3rd child is completely addicted. Just turned 2 and she only gets one while sleeping, but she sucks on one and then holds one in each hand! I’m not even going to try and wean her until she is a bit older I can reason with her a bit more. I’m all for picking your battles and this is not one I am willing to give up THAT much sleep for! (I’m scared lol)

  16. I know a couple that took their 3-year-old son to a bike store and let him pick out a bike. They said that if he wanted it, he had to pay for it, and it cost 3 binkies. So, they got the cashier in on it, and the little guy paid for his bike with binkies and never asked about them again.

  17. My son held on to his binky like it was a lifeline! We actually started out by only giving it to him during naps and when he was real fussy, but as time went on, he seemed to want it more (it went from a suckle need, to a want). My mom found the bye bye binky method (www.bye-bye-binky.com), printed it and suggested that we go with it. At first I was a bit mad at my mom, but I soon got over it. The method worked amazingly well. My son stopped sucking on it after 4 days! He proceeded to carry it around for another week, but never put it in his mouth. He then got tired of carrying it and simply lost interest. Mom was right, it worked, highly recommended!

    1. I second the bye-bye-binky method! My son had the binky 24/7. We started the method last week, and while we still have binkies lying around he’ll put it in his mouth for 2 seconds and then abandon it. He’s even sleeping without it. Much less painful than going cold turkey, which is where I thought we were headed (we actually tried it one day; one of the worst days of my life!).

  18. At 20 months i started limmitting my DD use to just naptime and bed time and started talking to her about her up coming birthday and that till the “suckie” was gone she would never really be 2 yrs old ( my little one has grasped the concept of time quite well early on) and then after a wile i started to take small chuncks out of them, then i would get my dd to look at it wile i would explain that it broke and neede to be thrown out and i would have her do it till i had only one left (for emergencys only, and thank god i did because she got chicken pox right after this :() and by her 2ed birthday she was “suckie” free

  19. With my older daughter when she turned two we made sure to get her helium balloons. After her party we tied her binkies to the strings and told her the binky was off to find another baby to help soothe since she was a big girl now. We made her wave bye bye and watched it sail off into the air. When she was asleep we tossed all the spares we had stashed around the house. A couple weeks later I mailed a thank you note to her from a made up little girl’ s mommy saying her binky had floated to make her baby happy. We plan on doing the same thing for my younger daughter when she turns two in a couple months. 🙂

  20. As a mum with a child with PDD-NOS autism it was my sanity some days! Even when she was much too old for it and I didn’t care what people thought in stores because the didn’t know what it was like to walk in my shoes with a daughter that looked normal on the outside but her brain wasn’t wired right. Many times I felt like telling people that stared that autism wasn’t a disability that showed on the outside. Because of the paci that she used or a behavior that didn’t fit her looks/age. I’m sure more than one person thought I was a terrible mother for either of those two. But they didn’t know either so thought the worst. My daughter was very and I mean VERY attached to hers. And I tried many methods of getting rid of it, but nothing worked until she was ready. She must have been about 4 1/2 maybe a tad older and in special education pre-school at the time, but she didn’t take it to class with her of course. But that was her security and comfort when she got overwhelmed with the world around her. That and self-stem behavior that she with with rubbing the tip of her nose. But I knew it has to go and my only way was bribery! It cost me a bundle in treats at the gas station, but it was worth it. We started with naps and moved to bedtime. After she went without it for the time specified we went right up to the gas station and she picked out her treat. After we moved from nap time to night time after special ed preschool we went to the gas station to let her pick her treat out. After we established that she could go all night without it for quite some time, we moved treat time to three times a week, to twice a week and then to weekly. And transitioned her to none at all. But I know our case was a bit out of the ordinary because of her disability, and we had to do it on her terms as well, and ROLO candies were her favorite at that time and when she could put two and two together to mean no paci meant she got to go to the gas station for a treat it worked. But she learned that if she asked for the paci and she got it then it also meant no treat and I didn’t give in on that. She did fall off the wagon a time or two and I didn’t hold it against her but she didn’t get the treat either. But instead of the paci she took her blanket almost everywhere for years later. But that was also better for her teeth and more socially acceptable as well. She’s still a blanket girl when she needs comfort and she stopped self stem behavior by rubbing her nose, but the trade of was that she twists her hair a particular way when things get to be too much for her or she has to concentrate. But I can live with that. She will be 10 this fall and has come VERY FAR and it’s all because of early intervention with an awesome special education preschool teacher! Now it seems like some days she doesn’t stop talking and remembers the oddest of details. She still doesn’t play like her peers but it’s her way. But I’m glad because I remember the fear I had back then of hearing those first words and putting two words together to going backwards until there were days I was thankful to get one maybe two words out in an entire day. But don’t ever feel bad if bribery is the only way that works. It’s not the end of the world and it gets the job done. It’s a solution to a problem that is just short term. Good Luck to everyone who falls into the position of needing to take that paci away from an older child that has the “addiction” to it.

    1. Oh Krissy! Thank you so much for sharing your story! What a heart touching experience. At least for me to read it. I understand just a small portion of the worry and frustration with Jade’s developmental delays. And I struggle with feeling as though people judge me when my 3.5 year old daughter is more like a 1.5 year old at times. She has her “things” too. Thankfully the binky is no longer one of them. But I did have to do the same; Just wait for her to be ready. Not push it. That’s why I know potty training will be a long ways off. I have to wait for her to be ready.

  21. My son took his suckies to the mall and put one in a build a bear dog. He threw the rest in the mall garbage. He attached to the dog like crazy at the beginning (he normally didn’t care that much about stuffies) but within 2 weeks just slept with his doggy. It was totally painless, and he was an addict so I was shocked it was so easy

  22. Took my daughter to her dentist appointment and the dentist told her it would give her cavities…. So she took it out and handed it to me and never asked for it again. Strang since we had been fighting with her to get rid of it for months

  23. Excellent article. I have a 15 month old who doesn’t get her “sucky” at bed/nap time. Only during the day when she’s up and gets fussy. I was just talking to my husband about this…When is the right time?
    She’s also around a lot of other kids who have pacifiers so that’s tough as well.
    Any suggestions?

    1. Hmm, I think you just have to gauge each child individually. If she doesn’t have too much anxiety and only uses it a little bit each day, she might be ready. Does she understand “bye bye” or “all gone”? If she can understand those phrases, it makes the transition super easy. Cause then you can talk about the sucky going bye bye. And it is easier for them to understand.

      1. Yes she understands all gone and bye bye.
        Just concerns me that she will still see other children using theirs and try and snatch them (she’s done it lol)

  24. These are really great tips. My 2 year old is addicted to his paci for bedtime only and we’re really fine with that. I’ve spoken to a sleep expert who says that 3 or even 4 isn’t crazy to still use the paci…if they need it for sleep, ripping it away from them is just going to disrupt sleep and cause further sleeping problems. And our dentist told us the other day not to worry about it until age 3, so I’m not. Funny how different people have different advice. I know that I sucked my fingers (yes, apparently my thumb wasn’t good enough…lol) until I was in first grade and never had any side effects from it. My first son is a horrible sleeper and never sucked on anything so I’ll take the paci over being woken up in the middle of the night by BOTH kids! 🙂

  25. I have twin girls and when they were 3 we told them that in order to get toys from Santa that he needs to take the paci’s. so after we decorated the house we confiscated the paci’s and whenever they cried and asked for them we reminded them that Santa has them and it worked!!!!!

  26. I know a lady who told me that her parents made her binky go bad. Her Dad told her that when you turn 2 binkies go bad. So for her 2nd birthday when she went to get her binky, it tasted terrible so she threw it out herself. They had dunked them in lemon juice. So it tasted sour, but didn’t hurt her at all.

  27. I only gave Abagail a Binky for a few months after she was born (Only when I felt it was really needed) and kind of wondered if it was needed at all to begin with. I also stopped her bottle and gave her a sippy with a rubber straw very early as well. Either it worked or I got really lucky, lol = Both probley. Strange how we do things just because they are done that way? I feel for some however and my sister had a horrible time and then even her little girl started sucking her thumb, so I know in some children it is extremely hard and maybe a “secure feeling” they need.

  28. My version of the Bye Bye Binky was short, sweet and easy on our child. We did it the same way with 4 kids and it worked so well we video taped it the 4th time.
    Check it out on youtube.
    http://youtu.be/YgrlYs-6cnM

    Scott Burnett
    Dad to Jadym, Maddie, Zack and Blake. All of them said Bye Bye Binky the FUN way!

  29. I’m an SLP (speech language pathologist) and I love all of these suggestions! I thought I would add trying to replace the pacifier with an age appropriate oral motor tool. The pacifier encourage suckling and poor tongue placement that can poorly impact speech production and swallowing skills. Try replacing with a “chewy tube” such as the ARK Grabber. You place the stick part of the tub on the infants back molars. The chewing is a healthy development in an infant/toddler. It will increase their jaw strength and stability, but it will not allow them to suckle to tube as they would a pacifier. I find that a lot of my patients that trying to get rid of the pacifier later in life (2 years plus) don’t only use in for oral comfort but also as stimulation. The chewy tube will provide that stimulation and ease the transition.

    1. That is a brilliant Idea!! Thank you! Do you happen to know where an average mom could find an ARK Grabber?
      Miss Jade has always had a speech delay, and I think part (not that it caused it, but could have added to the problem) was her Pacifier use, even though she was only allowed to have it at bedtime and naptime. I would love to know more about the ARK grabber in case we have another child, I will be more prepared for an easy transition from a paci to something more productive.

      1. The Ark Grabber is made by Ark Therapeutic, but you can also buy them off of Amazon! I find Amazon to be cheaper. I think they’re about $6, and I want to think you can use your Amazon prime shipping too.

  30. Our son loves his pacifier. The good thing is we can already take it from him during the day (out of site out of mind type of deal) but relys on it a lot when it comes to naps and bedtime. The one time he lost his pacifier in his crib and he was up for the rest of the day (woke up at 2am) so night time is going to be the challenge I think. Either way it’s going to be better than a thumb sucker….I was one and my mom finally broke me at 8 by getting a thumb guard put in by an orthodontist. At least with a pacifier I can take it away that is why I was praying that he would take one when he was born and he did.

  31. Luckily all three of my girls were only on the binky for 3-4 months before they self soothed. It was like like they just didn’t want it anymore one day! Super lucky! My mother on the other hand not so lucky lol When my younger brother was a baby he was a binkaholic! He has to have one to suck on and one in each hand before being calm.

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  33. For my son, all we did was cut the soother. Then handed it to him he tried putting it in his mouth then he threw it. When he sees it I hand it to him and he throws it haha works great.

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  35. I didn’t have a problem with my boys. i took them away before they were a month old. Didn’t want them in daycare with them.

    A neighbor used this trick…I have a small pomeranian, Homey, that their son, Eli, liked to play with. Homey and I took a road trip across country and when we returned Eli came up to him and said “Bad Homey, bad Homey.” I looked at his father who told me that Homey stole Eli’s binky to take on the trip with us!

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